Okay. I warned you. Really, you won't like it. Go read something else.
I am tired; so tired that after my (admittedly intense) workout this morning I felt physically sick. I need sleep. // I'm freaking out a little bit about my last two projects due this semester. I got overly ambitious in this research project due tomorrow, now I'm doing last-minute restructuring to the entire endeavor in order to put out a mediocre paper when what I really want to produce is an awesome paper that contributes to real knowledge. // I've got a series in Chicago coming up REAL fast and I feel so underprepared, all the while wishing, hoping, (but not really praying) that it will be beneficial to the world and an instrument of the Spirit. // All of this academic studying into theological problems in the Adventist church is a great weight upon my mind. The thing is that in academia
And when you study theology, that means that everything about your faith is under fire. On every issue I look at, I end up staring into the face of doubt and it's a conscious choice to
and to (again and again) submit myself to God's Word, knowing that I can't wait to believe until every question is settled.... waiting for additional light. I face questions not only from inside, and not only from my coursework, but I, for better or worse, am also the go-to person for other people's doubts. As I said, this is a great weight upon my mind. // The magnolias are beautiful. Very, very beautiful.